Continuing with the silly mood:
Proud Cystic-Fibrosis Foundation Doesn’t Need Your Charity
AITKIN, MN—A Dream To Breathe Foundation reasserted its status as a “non-profit organization” and expressed embarrassment at unnecessary “handouts.”
Cystic-fibrosis foundation A Dream To Breathe, which has refused to accept more than $250,000 in donations since 2001, announced Monday that it was continuing to make strides in fighting the rare respiratory disorder without any handouts from “self-righteous do-gooders.”“In the past three months alone, thousands of people from all across the country have come out and asked us to take their money, insisting that we need it more than they do,” said Development Director Joan Vandercamp in an urgent plea to Americans to take their pity elsewhere. “To you and countless others, we can only say: Who do we look like? The Salvation Army?”
“When we need your help wiping this degenerative disorder that affects 30,000 Americans off the face of the earth, we’ll let you know, okay?” she added.
According to Vandercamp, who described her foundation as an independent organization determined to make a difference in the lives of those with cystic fibrosis and not “some pathetic charity case,” A Dream To Breathe is perfectly capable of finding a cure for the deadly genetic disease that strikes the lungs and pancreas without anyone else’s aid.
“Not that it’s any of your concern, but we’ve been raising plenty of awareness on our own, thank you very much, and we’d really like to keep it that way,” said Vandercamp, who added that her foundation already had its hands full identifying the defective protein-producing gene earlier in victims of the disease without others trying to get involved. “We may not be the biggest or the most successful organization of our kind, but we have dignity, and I’ll be damned if we let your patronizing donations change that.”
Read the rest at The Onion…
Nedra helps nonprofits and public agencies create positive change on health and social issues through social marketing and transmedia storytelling strategies at Weinreich Communications since founding the company in 1995. She helps organizations make a difference for the populations they serve by strategically designing programs that draw on state-of-the-art behavior change techniques, digital media approaches and the power of stories. 
I am the parent of a child with cystic fibrosis and I do not see the funny part of this story. In fact, it makes me very angry that somebody would take the time to do such a disservice to the cause, which is to make life easier for those who have cf, i.e. new treatments, and ultimately to find a cure for this dreadful disease.
Anna Palazola mom of 3, one with cf.
Anna,
I’m sorry you were offended by this story, but I can assure you that neither I nor, I believe, the writers at the Onion, intended to make light of the serious nature of cystic fibrosis. Rather, it is a satiric jab at the nonprofit sector, of which most organizations are constantly begging potential donors for support. The point could be made with any disease or social problem, but they happened to use cystic fibrosis. I highlighted the story here because of the “you have to laugh, or else you’ll cry” nature of the nonprofit world. I wish you and your children all the best.
Perhaps if you had any insight into what it’s like to have cystic fibrosis or be the parent of a child with cystic fibrosis, you would have held your laughter for something that is actually funny. This is not at all amusing and you should be ashamed.
Marcia, mom of 2, one with cf
The only “funny” yet actually disgusting thing about this story is how an organization that is supposed to be raising funds for an incurable disease actually admits to being so cavalier about turning down donations. They are actually operating counter to the way an organization raising funds to find a cure should act. With the attitude Ms Vandercamp conveys, perhaps she should seek employment with a Presidential campaign that, unlike CF, truly don’t need the money or the so- called pity yet behave as such. She should be ashamed not to mention replaced. She is insensitive, arrogant and egotistical not to mention completely obtuse as to the nature of her function. What does she think funds the research needed to put an end to this horrible disease? Awareness is important but it sure doesn’t pay the bills! Moreover, I’m sorry Anna, but you DID choose the wrong cause to “try” to make us understand the nature of the nonprofit world. Perhaps an interview with some celebrity who supports PETA yet carries around a $1000.00 Lambskin purse would have been more effective.
My apologies to Anna…it was Nedra Weinreich I was addressing in my comments of November 2, 2007. My prayers are with you Anna!!!
Apparently the satire is a little too subtle for some. I will spell it out: This is not real. It is showing the absurdity of an idea taken to its extreme. It has nothing to do with cystic fibrosis and everything to do with the nature of fundraising by charities. If you want more practice deciphering social satire, I suggest reading Jonathan Swift’s Modest Proposal.
Nedra
If you were the parent of a child with a chronic life shortening disease I think that you would understand why non for profits like the CFF are “constantly begging potential donors for support.” We do it because we want our children to live longer healthier lives. There is nothing funny about that at all.
I think that it is really you who ‘don’t get it.’ You are trying to improve your career and seem to be willing to hurt people in order to do it. Perhaps meeting some kids with CF or Leukemia and getting to know what their life is like might help you to ‘get it.’
Sarah M mom to a 2 year old with CF
I have two girls with CF. I spend most of my time watching them struggle to clear the sticky mucus that fills their lungs. Where do I start…Let’s see…The CF foundation is not a do nothing non-profit. They funded drug research and development to the tune of 48 million last year (all non-profits combined totaled 75 million). This business model (where non-profits fund R&D directly) is called venture philanthropy. The CF foundation pioneered it. Drug companies don’t fund R&D for CF because it isn’t a win according to their cost/benefit models – restless leg is, go figure. The foundation has had some success funding drug companies directly – Pulmozyne, Tobi, Denufosol (in phase III development). Bet you didn’t know any of this. Maybe before you write your next satirical story, you’ll do a little research. You could even let your creative juices flow and make up a ficticious non-profit. I guess the other thing that bothers me, and maybe everyone else, is that I really struggle with the guilt of having to “beg” for money from my friends and family so that my children might live longer lives. God, it sucks. You have no idea. Maybe Johnathan Swift knows.
First of all, I did not write this story. I reprinted it from the Onion, which is a satirical newspaper.
Secondly, if you read the article, this is about a fictitious nonprofit called “A Dream to Breathe.” It is not talking about the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation, which I’m sure does wonderful work. The Onion apparently was using the term “Cystic-Fibrosis Foundation” as a generic term in the headline without realizing that was an actual organization.
Thirdly, satire means that it is the OPPOSITE of what is true. Of course cystic fibrosis organizations and others addressing critical medical problems need money, and lots of it, and unfortunately have to ask for money from donors. And of course I have nothing but sympathy for the victims of CF and their families. Reprinting this article was not intended to in any way offend or upset people dealing with this disease, and I’m sorry about that. It was intended to show the irony of having to beg for money for such an important disease. I thought the satire was obvious, but apparently it was not.
The satire is obvious. You’re correct. And I’ve been a reader of ‘The Onion’ for years and have been equally amused and offended. I understand the importance of satire as a way for our society to become self-aware and challenge the status quo. And I acknowledge that the writer’s intent was to enlighten us all on the irony of charities refusing charity. Ahh, so funny. I especially enjoyed the bit about the CF kids choking on their own mucous. Freaking hilarious. I laughed so hard I choked on my own mucous and almost died myself. So funny, well maybe not as funny as a kid dying. (Did you understand I was being facetious?) No, then perhaps you should go read some Oscar Wilde for a jolly good lesson in wit and sarcasm. Seriously, as a parent of a two-year-old girl with CF, I’m offended more by your sarcastic tone, than by the article itself. I understand satire and irony and yes, I’ve even read Jonathon Swift, “Satire is a sort of glass, wherein beholders do generally discover everybody’s face but their own”– But the way in which you’re talking to parents of kids with CF with such a demeaning manner, accusing them of being so completely clueless to your superior intellect is reprehensible. Maybe Nedra, while taking a satirical jab at the nonprofit sector, this article actually jabbed the families living with CF everyday. Because I don’t see any nonprofits responding to this article or to you. And maybe that’s the real irony. Maybe satire is a sort of glass where beholders discover everyone’s face but their own. If you really want to help the world, satire is great, but a donation is even better. http://www.cff.org
I found this article to be very hurtful. I have a 9 year old step-daughter who is living with Cystic Fibrosis. The thought that anyone could write something about any person with CF drowning in their own mucous to AMUSE people, when it is the reality that so many of us live with IS painful.
Then add the fact that I know it is something that pops up when you google search for Cystic Fibrosis T-Shirts, it is also harmful. Not everyone knows what the Onion is, and not everyone knows that “A Dream To Breathe,” is a made up organization. Saying that the Onion did not know there was an organization called the “Cystic Fibrosis Foundation” is no excuse. They should have done some research before they printed this article.
This article has the potential to make people NOT donate to CF.
Excuse me for having to leave so soon, I have to go beat my step-daughter, so she WON’T drown in her own mucous, as much as that may ruin a good laugh or two.
BTW, you saying you only reprinted the article doesn’t make you any less despicable.
who did write it?
jmorgan, it would have been someone at the Onion (theonion.com). If you want to find the name of the author, you could probably contact them to track it down.